


The Young Justice League Notice Board

by ladyofrosefire, LuminescentLullaby



Category: Young Justice (Cartoon), Young Justice - All Media Types
Genre: Comedy, Dick is a circus kid, Gen, list format, ships are no longer subtle, ships are subtle so far if they aren't canon, there's nothing subtle about Dickbabs, this should surprise no one
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-01-19
Updated: 2017-07-08
Packaged: 2018-09-18 15:38:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 4,283
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9391376
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ladyofrosefire/pseuds/ladyofrosefire, https://archiveofourown.org/users/LuminescentLullaby/pseuds/LuminescentLullaby
Summary: If a group of superheroes occupies the same space for long enough, they'll have to lay down some rules for living together. The only reason the first one isn't 'take the list seriously' is because no one would listen.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [The Official Wayne Family Notice Board](https://archiveofourown.org/works/8660653) by [theragingstorm](https://archiveofourown.org/users/theragingstorm/pseuds/theragingstorm). 



> Set post season 2, Wally walked back out of the Speed Force because we can, that’s why. Clone Roy will be listed as Roy, amputee Roy will be listed as Arsenal, just so there’s no confusion
> 
> Thank you to tumblr user finndamereyn for beta reading

_Okay, team. I’ve noticed that our headquarters is, to put it gently, a mess. I don’t just mean physically but wow, guys. Really. Socks do not belong in the kitchen. So I’m making this list, and people can add to it, but obviously Canary and Batman have the final say in what actually sticks as a rule so keep that in mind. Hopefully it’ll help things run more smoothly._

__-Dick_ _

 

  * Seriously, get your socks out of the kitchen?? _\- Dick_



 

  * Especially anyone in any way associated with the Flash. Those things belong in quarantine. _\- Dick_



 

  * I didn't just mean socks when I said socks, guys. Conner, how did that shirt even end up in with my cereal? _\- Dick_



 

  * Are we sure keeping this list is a good idea?- _Kaldur_



 

  * Please turn the TV off when you’re not using it. Static doesn’t count. _\- Dick_
    * Since when did the Justice League have problems paying the electric bill? _\- Wally_



 

  * M’gann, I think it would be best if you didn’t impersonate team or League members unless absolutely necessary. _\- Black Canary_



 

  * Tim having the highest WoW ranking does not make him the wisest member of our team.- _Kaldur_
    * I'M THE LEADER OF MY GUILD FOR A REASON, YOU ASSHATS- _Tim_



 

  * Conner, I know this isn’t strictly about helping you all live and work better as a team, but you could really use a hobby. _\- Black Canary_
    * Btw babe, eating, punching, and me don’t count as hobbies. _\- Tim_



 

  * If you can’t reach something, get a stepstool. It’s kinda terrifying waking up to banging and crashing in the kitchen, and someone could get hurt. _\- Dick_
    * Think he means you, shortstack? _\- Roy_
    * YOU’RE NOT EVEN ON THIS TEAM ANYMORE _\- Tim_
    * Funny you knew who he meant, though. _\- Artemis_



 

  * Do not tease Dick Grayson about his past hairstyle choices
    * Not signing it doesn’t actually make anyone think you’re not the one who posted this, Dick. _\- Babs_
    * No one else would defend that mullet. _\- Tim_



 

  * No swearing around children.- _M’gann_
    * This includes saying “my power is bullshitting” (this means you, Mal) _\- Dick_
    * You know, we’re all children _.- Mal_
    * Speak for yourself. Besides, we mean ‘stop swearing in front of Gar’. _\- Dick_



 

  * Saying how much Tim sounds like Hiro from _Big Hero 6_ was funny  the first time. It has gotten old.- _Babs_



 

  * Do not for ANY reason caffeinate Bart!!!!!!!!!! _-_ _Tim_



 

  * Urban Dictionary shouldn’t be how Bart learns about slang. Or anything. Take three seconds and explain it to him yourselves.- _Babs_
    * Will someone explain the _sitting in a tree_ rhyme?- _Bart_
    * I’m not touching that one- _Mal_



 

  * Piñatas shaped like League or team members do not belong in HQ. Even I know that.- _Wally_
    * Try and stop me- _Arsenal_



 

  * Tim, bro, you can cool it with the “testing our cyber security” line. We all know you were hacking into the system to change your height in your file.- _Dick_



  * It’d be cool if wonderboy stopped dropping bad puns every two minutes, thanks _\- Jaime_
    * They may be kinda cheesy, but they sound gouda to me.- _Dick_
    * Never speak again.- _Lagaan_



 

  * I’m a little tired of being called “chum”. _\- Conner_
    * I don’t care _\- Lagaan_
    * Yeah, well, no one cares about you, fishstick. - _Conner_
    * Proportional responses, Conner, we've talked about this.- _Black Canary_



 

  * If you notice that we’re running low on a snack, say something. Especially if the snack Isn’t yours _.- Wally_



 

  * Whoever drank the last of my chai is getting an arrow where the sun doesn't shine, got it? _\- Artemis_



 

  * Batman won’t let you do the “nananananana” thing on patrol for a reason, Dick.- _Babs_
    * Why do you think I became Nightwing?- _Dick_
    * Because someone finally explained to you what a Technicolor nightmare you looked like?- _Mal_
    * You should have seen him before he got pants- _Babs_



 

  * I don't know which of you put the bow on Sphere, but she likes it and she's keeping it, so I hope you weren't planning on getting it back.- _Conner_



**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you want to see more of a certain character, ask away. Can't promise we'll get to it immediately, but we'll do our best.


	2. Valentine's Special

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Valentine's Day at HQ is... interesting?

  * First my snacks, then Artemis's tea? Bart, c'mon. Also, I told you so.- _Wally_
    * Not. Helping. But he’s right. You were warned. _\- Artemis_



 

  * Artemis is not cupid.- _Wally_



  * I am definitely not cupid.- _Roy_



  * Calling Green Arrow cupid is awkward for everyone, especially when Black Canary is in the room.- _Dick_



  * Suggesting that anyone dress up as Cupid will end in a bloody nose.- _Artemis_



  * Suggesting that Dick dress up like Cupid will end with him doing it. Don’t.- _Conner_



  * Touching other people’s gear without permission, or using their weapons without permission, is not allowed. Even it if is seasonal. _Especially_ if the weapons in question are sharp projectiles that can punch through kevlar.- _Black Canary_



  * Also, Dick, Wally? Green Arrow wants a word with you both.- _Black Canary_
    * Dead man walking. Wally, babe, you’ll be fine.- _Artemis_



 

  * Coms and mental link are for the mission, not for discussing Valentine’s Day plans- _Babs_



  * Public spaces are PG.- _Dick_
    * Hypocrite!- _Tim_



 

  * The following are not allowed in HQ for safety reasons: trails of flower petals, trails of candles, unattended open flame, large amounts of candy in places where anyone associated with the Flash can reach it. Sorry, Bart.- _Black Canary_
    * It was a sweet gesture, Dick, but you could have waited until we were home- _Babs_
    * You're all associated with me.- _Bart_



 

  * I thought mistletoe was a Christmas tradition? It’s getting kinda awkward, guys- _Bart_



  * Singing _“Kiss the Girl”_ at Lagaan and M’gann was funny _once_.- _Dick_
    * Spoilsport- _Zatanna_



 

  * Ix-nay on the glitter in public spaces. I have to be stealthy _._ \- _Tim_



 

  * No rains of flower petals either, Z.- _Tim_



 

  * Also quit trying to make my boyfriend blush- _Tim_
    * Please tell me these things aren’t related- _Artemis_
    * What? No!- _Tim_



 

  * Stop flirting with my brother when he stops by. It’s weird, he’s Superman, and his girlfriend is a lot scarier than any of you. - _Conner_



 

  * M’gann is no longer allowed in the kitchen without supervision other than the person she is dating. _\- Kaldur_
    * Did she egg you, too, Lagann?- _Conner?_
    * I'm pretty sure that if your mis-flipped pancake is still stuck to the ceiling after three hours, you should seriously reconsider your recipe.- _Bart_



 

  * Wally should not be allowed in the kitchen unsupervised, either.- _Karen_



 

  * Or Bart- _Jaime_



 

  * Or Arsenal. The kitchen is not for making bombs.- _Babs_
    * C’mon! It’s Valentine’s Day!- _Gar_



 

  * If Wolf starts howling, that means you stop singing.- _Artemis_



 

  * I realize that many of you are over eighteen and are in committed relationships, and that the latter is not a requirement for the kind of Valentine’s Day plans that should be kept quiet, but please do not discuss those plans or leave signs of those plans lying around HQ.- _Black Canary_
    * You know, I’ve had the birds and the bees talk. You can say ‘sex’- _Gar_
    * ….do I want to know?- _Tim_
    * No.- _Mal_
    * Green, fuzzy, metal.- _Dick_
    * Not needed, ese! _\- Jaime_



 

  * If you value your limbs, don’t try to take the giant teddybear my brother gave Conner- _Dick_
    * How’d you carry that? It’s bigger than you!- _Gar_



 

  * I have been on Earth for five years. Trying to teach me about fake Valentine’s Day traditions will not work.- _M’gann_
    * Anymore, at least.- _Artemis_
    * Oh god don't remind me.- _Conner_



 

  * This doesn’t mean you should start doing it to Bart- _Wally_



  * Whoever is putting up post-it notes on every vertical surface saying 'Happy Valentine's Day fuckers', please stop.- _Babs_



 

  * CAN EVERYONE STOP STEALING THE FLOWERS I'M TRYING TO GIVE BABS?- _Dick_
    * ...the notes are you, aren’t they.- _Babs_
    * I am not admitting anything.- _Dick_



 

  * Chocolate is not dinner.- _Black Canary_



 

  * Dinner must involve something that in some way involves food.- _Black Canary_



 

  * To all single members of the team: we feel bad for you, but playing “All by Myself’ all day is excessive.- _Everyone with a significant other_



 

**Dick Grayson’s List of Clothes Found in Places They Shouldn't Be**

  * Socks, assorted. Thank you for getting them out of the kitchen, but the living room isn’t better


  * Shirt. Kaldur’s, hallway. Wet.


  * Sneakers. Jaime’s, living room. Sorry, dude. Wolf got at them.


  * Costume. Bart, outside medbay


  * Three shirts (you need a better costume). Conner, various locations


  * Cowl, boots, and cape. Babs. This may have been my fault.


  * Shirt. Wally’s, hanging on the mop in the hall closet. Artemis, I’m holding you partially responsible for this one. I know it’s Valentine’s but REALLY? 




	3. Chapter 3

  * Okay so no one suggest that Conner try using a trampoline inside ever again??? Thanks. _\- Tim_
    * I thought it’d be fun! _\- Dick_
    * I still have ceiling plaster stuck in my ear. - _Conner_



 

  * On a related note, please don’t throw your teammates outside of training exercises.- _Black Canary_



  * Only throw teammates during training exercises if you have a spotter, mats, and helmets.- _Black Canary_



 

  * The helmets are for both people involved in the throwing- _Black Canary_



 

  * Singing the “reach” jingle isn’t funny- _Jaime_



 

  * Neither is the game “Simon says” _\- M’gann_



 

  * Post mission therapy sessions aren't mandatory, but they are strongly recommended.- _Black Canary_
    * I have candy, I’m crash.- _Bart_
    * Cosigned! Flash family motto! _\- Wally_
    * Feelings are bullshit and I did not sign up for them.- _Conner_
    * Conner! Gar’s reading this.- _M’gann_



 

  * No one call my brother’s selfies “Dick pics” ever again if you like having functioning computers- _Tim_
    * Cosigned- _Babs_
    * Awww- _Dick_



 

  * Duct tape does not actually fix everything.- _Karen_
    * … oops?- _Bart_



 

  * If I complain about something that might be genetic, saying I could have been more like Lex Luthor isn’t comforting.- _Conner_
    * Hey, nothing like a reminder that you could have been bald to make you feel grateful. - _Dick_
    * I’m still not sure what there is to complain about?? Like, you’ve seen Superman, right?? - _Bart_
    * You’re both awful- _Babs_



 

  * Duck-duck-goose is banned from HQ after the wind funnel incident.- _Black Canary_
    * Tag is also banned- _Black Canary_



 

  * Yelling ‘no capes’ at Superman is fine, and Shazam thinks it’s funny. Doing it to _Batman_ is asking for a Darwin Award, and I won’t help you get out of it. _\- Babs_



 

  * Maybe don’t ask Batman about rumors involving Wonder Woman carrying him away from a fight bridal style?- _Tim_



 

  * Don’t ask him about the ones where he’s in a fireman’s carry, either- _Tim_



 

  * No one say ‘flailing dipshit’. Jason already made that mistake.- _Dick_



 

  * Beautiful, why is the kitchen full of honey? - _Mal_
    * I don’t know why you’re asking me. I didn’t do it. Not everything related to bees is my fault. - _Karen_



 

  * No showing Bart _Sonic the Hedgehog_.- _Jaime_



  * Pleeeeeaaaaase please please I’m begging you do not make out on the couch, especially if you’re my family. _\- Tim_
    * @me next time- _Dick_



 

  * Don’t. Call. Me. Timmy!!!! _\- Tim_
    * Whatever you say, Timmy. _\- Conner_
    * Has anyone else noticed that you can tell how much coffee Tim's had recently by looking at the unnecessary punctuation?- _Babs_



 

  * No singing during missions. - _Artemis_



 

  * Especially not “Let It Go”. - _Raquel_



 

  * I don’t care if it’s stuck in your head. Get it unstuck. - _Jaime_



 

  * I don’t know why you guys keep coming to me when Wolf chews up your stuff. Take it up with him. He’s been on this team longer than most of you anyway, so he has seniority.  - _Conner_



 

  * Pets need approval from some authority figure, and Dick does not count. Sorry.- _Black Canary_
    * Aawwwww….- _Gar_
    * I’ll bring my dog by some time.- _Black Canary_
    * :D :D :D :D - _Gar_



 

  * Doing magic tricks at Wolf with his treats is just mean.- _Gar_
    * :( :( :( :(  BUT IT’S SO CUTE- _Zatanna_



 

  * You don’t get to complain about glitter if I put a sign on the thing that says “warning: contains glitter”- _Zatanna_



  * Whoever replaced the coffee with decafé will pay.- _Tim_



 

  * Conner. I love Wolf so much but you have got to tell him he’s not a lap dog. I love pancakes, but I don’t wanna be one.- _Bart_



 

  * Please no jokes about redhead fever in front of members of the League- _Dick_



 

  * They’re hilarious! But really, guys, that’s my dad- _Dick_



 

  * (There is no cure, but you can learn to live with redhead fever)- _Dick_



 

**Dick Grayson’s List of Clothes Found in Places They Shouldn't Be : Part 2**

  * I. Found. Socks. In. The. Kitchen.
  * No.
  * This is why I made the list
  * Guys please
  * Lagaan, I would ask what you were wearing if I found your shorts on the stairs, but I am too scared.
  * More of Conner’s shirts
  * LEARN TO USE A HAMPER, GUYS



**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Canary's dog is small and wiggly and needs to be loved. It also occasionally chews on Ollie's boots.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> feat. the fallout of April Fool's Day

  * Don’t startle Conner or the bees. I shouldn’t have to say this! Bees don’t like being startled!- _Gar, Karen_
    * Why does Conner have BEES?!- _Wally_
    * You told me I needed a hobby- _Conner_
    * Does this mean I can call you honeybunch now? ;) :D - _Tim_



 

  * Whoever gave Bart Heelys has to clean up the mess he made crashing into that wall.- _Dick_



  * Unrelated to either of the two above bullet points: Jaime, I know saying ‘I told you so’ is satisfying, but it doesn’t help things calm down.- _Dick_



 

  * If you’re going to do backflips down hallways for no good reason, you could at least bother to make sure no one’s coming down it first, Dick.- _Babs_



 

  * WHO REPLACED MY LUNCH WITH FISH FOOD?!- _Lagaan_
    * You mean it wasn’t already?- _Conner_
    * Both of you. Stop.- _Black Canary_



 

  * Please stop watching _Dancing with the Stars_ when Conner's in the room, guys. I'm all for him learning what all he was programmed to know, but I'm only human. I can only take so much of this.- _Tim_
    * We should watch _Dirty Dancing_ next!- _Zatanna_



 

  * If Tim is still awake at five am, it's safe to assume that a) this is not the first day in a row that he's done it, b) whatever he's working on isn't as important as he says it is, and c) it's perfectly acceptable protocol to trap him in a blanket and carry him over a shoulder away from the computer.- _Dick, Conner_



  * If you’re going to turn the training room into an ice rink, give everyone a 24 hour warning. _\- Artemis, cosigned Wally_



  * “When in doubt, blame Lex Luthor” does not apply to:
    * Missing snacks
    * Mess of any kind
    * Not doing mission reports
    * Saran-wrap covered doorways- _Kaldur_



 

  * No supervillain is to be blamed for any pranks.- _Kaldur_
    * Okay but what about the time Harley switched everyone’s costumes around?- _Tim_



 

  * No supervillain is to be blamed for pranks except with evidence.- _Kaldur_



 

  * Sneaking out is not allowed. Or at the very least, stop using the same three excuses. I wasn’t born yesterday. - _Black Canary_
    * No, but Conner was~ _-Wally_
    * Hey, I’m six now, screw you. - _Conner_
    * We know, we know, you’re a big boy now. - _Dick_



 

  * Do not bring Wolf into the showers- _Mal_



 

  * Do not use up all the hot water. How do you even use up all the hot water?!- _Wally_



 

  * Do not track water from the shower to our room.- _Artemis_
    * I feel attacked- _Conner_
    * Good.- _Artemis_



 

  * “Bend and Snap” is BANNED from HQ. BANNED!- _Tim_
    * Why must you take my every source of joy- _Babs_



 

  * Please stop asking me if I know every fish we see.- _Kaldur_



 

  * For the love of God STOP WITH THE DAMN MEMES ON MISSIONS- _Artemis_
    * I came out to have a good time and honestly I feel so attacked right now.- _Wally_



 

  * I will be instituting a swear jar- _M’gann_
    * ...the kind of swear jar with quarters, right?- _Conner_
    * Is there another kind?- _Tim_
    * So my family is just weird. Okay.- _Conner_
    * And water's wet.- _Dick_



 

  * Three puns per mission.- _Kaldur_
    * AW, COME ON- _Zatanna_
    * NANANANANANANANANANANANANANANANA SUCK IT- _Dick_
    * Man, never say that again- _Mal_



 

  * Tell Conner to put important things down before you show him cute animal videos. He’ll quish anything he’s holding- _Karen_
    * Noted!- _Gar_



 

  * I can’t actually order you not to have a competition over who’s name was mangled worst at Starbucks, but I can tell you to do it on your own time- _Black Canary_
    * Dork, Duck, Dink…- _Dick_
    * Hayme- _Jaime_
    * Satan- _Zatanna_



 

  * Stop using gymnastics to take your clothes off! I caught a flying pair of pants to the face- _Karen_
    * Again: my every source of joy.- _Babs_



 

  * Experimental caffeinated beverages are not allowed, especially for members of the Flash family. We do not want a repeat of the koala incident.- _Kaldur_
    * Do I wanna know?- _Jaime_
    * NO!!!- _Artemis_



 

  * The Red Robin theme is NOT ALLOWED. No one, especially Conner, is allowed to do the response to it.- _Dick_



 

  * After April Fool’s Day, the following are BANNED from HG: Silly string, water balloons, glitter, all forms of slime, plastic bugs, and plastic rats. Superglue is by permission only- _Black Canary_



 

  * To whomever thought it was a good idea to glitterbomb Batman, I’ll say something nice at your funeral- _Green Arrow_



 

**Dick Grayson’s List of Clothes Found in Places They Shouldn't Be:** Part 3

  * Boxers, Tim’s. I will never be the same again. Also, Conner? Batman wants to talk to you.
  * ………...it has been brought to my attention that the socks were mine.
  * DICK’S PANTS.- _Karen_
  * My list!!!!
  * YOUR DAMN PANTS, TOO- _Karen_



**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Can anyone catch the reference to Unpretty’s Christmas in Kansas?   
> When Conner gets the Saw Cute, Must Squeeze urge, things go Crunch.


	5. Chapter 5

 

  * The tradition of singing “Dancing Queen” when someone turns 17 isn’t going anywhere- _Zatanna, Dick_



 

  * No enchanting the list so you can use text emojis on it. I should not have to explain why messing with magic is a terrible idea- _Black Canary_


    * :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( - _Zatanna_



 

  * No “netflix and chill”ing on the couch- _Karen_



 

  * Why is there a goat wandering around??? - _Jaime_
    * Sorry, that’s mine. - _Conner_
    * Does this? Answer? Anything? - _Dick_
    * Don’t question the goat or it’ll leave! - _Gar_



 

  * Don’t use your code names when you’re in civilian clothing.- _B_
    * A wild Batman appears! _\- Dick_



 

  * Babysitting Lian does not mean sitting her down in front of the TV and playing _Kill Bill_.- _Roy_
    * Just pass my niece to me.- _Artemis_



 

  * Definitely do not show scary movies to Jon Kent.- _Dick_



 

  * If you guys would stop letting Tim in the kitchen, we’d still have a kitchen. Just saying. _\- Artemis_



 

  * If my door is closed, it means I don’t want visitors in my head, or in my room.- _Karen_



 

  * Tim, give me my shirts back. _\- Conner_



 

  * Batfamily prank wars are to remain self-contained. Do not drag the team into them again. I’m not sure this place will ever be the same after last time.- _Kaldur_



 

  * I know Conner slips up and spoils classic movies sometimes, but the solution is NOT to scare the living daylights out of him- _Karen_
    * Yeah, blame my programming and go punch Luthor instead. - _Conner_
    * The solution to a lot of problems is 'go punch Luthor instead'- _Arsenal_



 

  * Dick, if you want to wear flower crowns, fine. Quit dropping them on other people.- _Conner_
    * Aww, I think they’re cute.- _Zatanna_
    * Yeah, but people keep yelling at _me_ when the bees start following them. - _Conner_
    * Bees don’t do anything if you don’t scare them!- _Karen, Gar_



 

  * If you’re sneezing and coughing, you do not go on patrol.- _Babs_



 

  * Conner, I know being sick is foreign to you, but you've got to stop helicoptering your teammates when they catch a cold. Ambushing people with tea and blankets is nice, but kind of terrifying. - _Artemis_
    * I'm not helicoptering. I can't even fly.- _Conner_
    * ^-_-^ - _Tim_
    * Solid Batman impression. 9/10 - _Dick_
    * Hey, at least all the tea means we’re using up some of the ridiculous amount of honey around here. - _Mal_



 

  * While I appreciate the sentiment, my code name is not “Den Mother”- ~~_Black Canary_~~ _Den Mother_



 

  * Whoever left the ‘Do Not Disturb the Blanket Burrito’ sign stuck to my face when I passed out, you’re a jerk. Whoever left the blanket… thanks. - _Tim_



 

  * Listen, Z, I love the abundance of bunnies spell as much as anyone else. No question. But you really need to get them gone before Wolf finds out about it or we’re going to have some serious problems. - _Dick_



 

  * No one. I repeat no one. Is to encourage Conner to cut his own freaking hair!!!! The fact that it looks weirdly hot is beside the point- _Tim_



 

  * Alright, this is getting out of hand. There’s now a limit of one comment on Conner’s new haircut per person per week. Guys, enough. - _Karen_
    * You’re only defending him because he has bees- _Lagaan_



 

  * Dick, I speak on behalf of the team when I say that you need to stop making powerpoint presentations.- _Kaldur_
    * I don’t know. I thought “Sex, Aliens, and You” was pretty funny.- _Roy_
    * That’s ‘cause it wasn’t aimed at you.- _Tim_
    * Yet. I heard something about you and Kori.- _Dick_



 

  * Don’t give Bart fuzzy socks! Don’t do it!! Why hasn’t anyone learned from the Wally incident?!- _Dick_



 

  * ~~When Dick is being a killjoy, don’t listen to him.- _Wally_~~



 

  * Please for the love of everything holy, don’t ever listen to “Sexy and I Know It” when Dick is around. We learned that lesson in the family the hard way. No one should ever have to deal with that horror again. - _Tim_



 

  * Gar, the correct response to 'I wish I could be a fly on the wall in there' is not 'one second'.- _Babs_



 

  * Thank you for the “sun’s out, guns out” shirt, Nightwing.- _Superman_
    * You know Lois is gonna _hate_ that thing- Conner
    * It’s funny- _Superman_
    * To you.- _Conner_



 

  * OHMYGODOHMYGODOHMYGOD SUPERMAN WROTE ON THE BOARD- _Wally_



 

  * THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE I’M CELEBRATING WITH FIREWORKS AND EVERYONE’S INVITED!!!!!!! :D :D :D - _Zatanna_



 

  * HOLY SHIT, THIS IS AWESOME _\- Mal_



 

  * I’M AWESOME _\- Dick_



 

  * Guys, please stop asking me to get my brother’s autograph.- _Conner_



**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [My friend actually made "Sex, Aliens, and You" at my request.](http://finndamereyn.tumblr.com/post/156913568947/i-have-no-other-explanation-to-this-than-dick-a) SFW


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry we were late, everyone. Things got a bit hectic.

  * Tim is not allowed to make powerpoints anymore, either.- _Dick_



 

  * Teammates from non-traditional backgrounds not knowing something is not an excuse to start yelling things they don’t understand. Even if it’s something you’re really passionate about. - _Black Canary_
    * BILL BILL BILL BILL - _Dick_
    * **BILL NYE THE SCIENCE GUY** - _Wally_



 

  * **_FOR THE LOVE OF GOD NO ONE LET CONNER WATCH “THE WINTER SOLDIER”_** \- Tim



 

  * Food related emergencies are valid- _Wally_
    * You do not get to skip patrol because you burned your mouth eating pizza- _Kaldur_



 

  * Do not bring fast food back to base if you value your fries. Bart is a shameless thief.- _Jaime_
  * No eating in the lab- _Karen_
    * …..I feel attacked- _Wally_



 

  * After the Poison Ivy incident, everyone should remain in their own rooms. We’re all really grateful that the pollen just makes everyone sneeze, but after Wally went right through the floor, and Conner blew Karen across the room, it’s become clear that isolation is still the best policy.- _Kaldur_



  * Please stop switching the labels on everything in the kitchen to confuse everyone.- _M’gann_
    * AAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAA- _Dick_
    * I will eat. All. Your cereal.- _Wally_



 

  * Stop calling us Atlanteans 'the Seamen'. I know what you're implying.- _La’gaan_



 

  * I hereby announce a ban on all Canadian terms. Especially Timbits.- _Tim_
    * Seconded, actually. I don’t need to hear about Conner eating anything with my brother’s name in them.- _Dick_



 

  * I would advise against making Sharknado jokes in front of Aquaman- _Kaldur_



 

  * It is even less advisable to joke about Bart or any other member of the Flash family recreating any scenes from those movies- _Kaldur_



 

  * If you persist in making jokes about Sharknado within earshot of Aquaman, I will not step in to help you- _Kaldur_



 

  * I did not think I had to tell you that actually recreating any scenes from any Sharknado movie is ill-advised.- _Kaldur_
    * I was trying to make a water spout! The sharks just happened!!!- _Bart_



 

  * If you shouldn’t track water through HQ, you definitely shouldn’t track sand indoors- _Babs_
    * I hate sand- _Wally_
    * It’s coarse. And irritating.- _Dick_
    * And it gets everywhere.- _Wally_
    * I am embarrassed to know either of you- _Tim_
    * You’re just mad you didn’t get there first, baby bro- _Dick_



 

  * Please respect the TV reservation schedule- _Kaldur_
    * I’m making cookies for “The Great British Bakeoff”!- M’Gann
    * Don’t float the ingredients this time- _Conner_



 

  * Let sleeping Superboys lie- _Babs_



 

  * We're all upset about how Supergirl handled meeting Conner, but you can't just form an angry mob.- _Cassie_
    * Not if people don't RSVP, we can't.- _Tim_



 

  * The correct way to ask me to demonstrate the Canary Cry is not “Screaming! It is scream time!”- _Black Canary_



 

  * In fact, there is no correct way to ask me to to demonstrate the Canary Cry.- _Black Canary_



 

  * Don’t try to bribe Wonder Woman with ice cream- _Cassie_
    * Why not? It’d work.- _Tim_



 

  * Similarly: DO NOT ASK WONDER WOMAN TO DEMONSTRATE THROWING TANKS. Look, it’s awesome. I know it’s awesome. I love it, and I love her. But if you want to see it, there’s security footage, and I will hook you up with it. We don’t need the military pissed off at us.- _Babs_



 

  * Healthy conflict resolution does not include shouting “MEET ME IN THE PIT”- _Black Canary_



 

  * The get-along-shirt is better in theory than in practice- _Babs_



 

  * Please don’t say “roll for intimidation” when one of the team is trying to question someone. I mean it’s funny as hell, but that’s the problem. We don’t need to start laughing while questioning Mr. Freeze.- _Dick_
    * Critical fail- _Tim_
    * Dude- _Dick_
    * WELL AM I WRONG?!- _Tim_



 

  * No mocking each other in our D&D games, either- _Dick_
    * ….Dammit- _Conner_



 

  * Conner and Dick owe quarters to the swear jar- _M’gann_



 

  * Please never respond to anything with “but did you die”. I get enough of that as it is.- _Tim_



 

  * …So watching Wolf dodging bubbles was cute. But maybe we shouldn’t put the poor guy through that again.- _Conner_



 

  * You guuuuuys, I'm green! You can stop pointing at random animals and asking if it's me.- _Gar_
    * Even Wolf?- _Conner_
    * Nope, you can keep pretending to get me confused with Wolf- _Gar_



 

**Dick Grayson’s List of Clothes Found in Places They Shouldn't Be:** Part 4

  * Kara’s boots
  * Someone’s swimming flipper… things
  * … a pair of my pants sorry guys
  * Pollen covered clothing that belongs in HAZMAT BAGS, GUYS. COME **ON**!!



**Notes for the Chapter:**

> drop by ask-ladyofrosefire.tumblr.com or the comments if you want to leave suggestions


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